Nearly 2 years after my first post and nearly 3 years of pursuing the “Indian dream” I’ve decided to post my last blog and focus on the next chapter of this incredible journey.

Tonight/very early tomorrow morning I head back to the UK.

Anyone who knows me personally will know it is always with mixed emotions that I head back to the UK.

This time is no different but there is an increasing sense of excitement about it, as this time, the trip back, is so much more than being back with family and friends.

Setting up Empower has been without doubt the best decision I have ever made. The last 4 months have been challenging but my decision to do this and the clarity of what I think can be achieved has never faltered.

In the UK

The focus for the next few months is clear and thanks to a recent interview with SSE India the clarity has never been greater.
The discipline to do this greater still.

For the first time ever my decision to be back in UK is entirely based on what I think is the right thing to do, not on what other people perceive the right thing is.
For both the business and me personally.

I will miss being in India but I know that a couple of months focused on building the company in the UK now will ultimately lead me back to India and enable me to continue “Living the dream”.

All about choice

It has been a rollercoaster of a journey.
What I don’t know about myself now is no ones business.
Looking back at my early blogs its odd to think of where this all began.
From a volunteer experience in the rural communities of Tamil Nadu, to employment with one of the UK’s most successful social enterprises to now setting up a new social enterprise.

I’m sure people will laugh at the simplicity of this but, after 3 years of challenging every aspect of convention and discovering what I want to do, it has all come down to choice and being bold enough to know what choices are right for me.

It is all about finding our own voice.  By this I mean knowing where our true skills, talents and passions lie and having the belief and conviction to use them.
Which is hard.
It takes a lot of introspection and knowing yourself.

Making choices based on this is even harder as we are all conditioned and moulded by our culture, religion (if we have one) and societal values on what the ‘right’ choices are.
We all live in a society that breeds fear into making unconventional choices.
A fear that is too often used to control peoples thoughts, emotions and actions.  But how much this fear controls us is a personal choice.

Who are the most influential people you know?
The people who inspire you the most?

Is it those who seek to control you (albeit in the name of love and cultural values) or those who believe in your potential?
Believe in you?

Teachers are often cited as people’s source of inspiration. Why?
Because the most effective teachers see potential in you that you don’t.
They use their talents to bring out individuals skill, talents and passions that are often stifled in the name of convention.
They create an environment for individuals to realise their potential and opportunities for these to be harnessed.
They don’t at the end of your school years try to keep you in school longer because they believe they have the monopoly to your success.
Excellent sports coaches don’t try and keep hold of talented individuals because it means their team/club is more likely to win every year.
They help individuals create and follow a path that enables them to achieve their true potential.  They see past convention and set people free.

In a digital world with increasing societal pressures, to be amazing, always perform, have the best job, family, house, car and life many of us are at a breaking point.  The pressure to conform leads to burnt out, broken, stressed and depressed people.  A result of years of control, conditioning and belief that this perceived success is only possible by following a certain path.  

To recognise this, is hard.  To change this harder still.

All about personal choice

I’ve lost count of the people that have said “I’d love to do this but I can’t”.
My response is always “why not?”
I totally accept that not everyones view of “living the dream” is living in rural Tamil Nadu in a basic house with a bucket to do your washing and neither should it be.
But how many people have taken time to know what they ultimately want to do and more importantly do it.

The only thing holding you back is you.

Finances, job, commitments are practical things that can be managed.
Family, friends and cultural pressure – it’s all a choice in how you respond to that.

It’s not about disrespect, its not about being a rebel.  It’s about weighing up choices and knowing the consequences of each of them and using this to make choices that are right for you.

It isn’t easy. At all.

But how many of us are people pleasers, doing what is right in someone else’s eyes and continuously limiting ourselves.
It isn’t about some hippy dreamy idea of us all being happy.
It is about people realising their potential and using this to create lasting positive change.

The real challenge

The challenge to do this in the west is huge but I believe that people in the west have much greater opportunities to do this than other countries and cultures.
“If you truly want something you will make it happen” but too many people limit themselves to what they have been told is possible.

In India I think the challenge is even greater.
The digital age is opening peoples eyes to what is possible, a different life but this is in direct conflict with traditional ingrained cultures that confines people to what they know, not what is possible.
So many people feel confined, held back and controlled (particularly women) all in the name of family respect and culture. 

India is known for its family values and rightly so, this is looked upon with envy from people in the west.  The community spirit is strong and people look out for each other in a way that long disappeared in western cultures.
Every family strives for strong social upstanding and respect.
In principle this is good but sadly this often achieved by controlling people to conform to what is culturally seen as acceptable.  It isn’t about empowering people to fulfil their dreams.

If I had a £1 for every story I’ve heard of people giving up on their dreams, of not using their skills and passion to carve a career out of what they love because the family do not perceive this to be the right thing to do, I would be a very wealthy person!

As the saying goes, “you love someone you set them free”. In India you love someone, you do everything you can to control them, to keep them close, out of a fear that setting them free means you will lose control.  Of course it is not called control, it is called cultural values.

Arranged marriage is still the norm in India and in my view is probably the greatest example of how people are controlled.  Of course in theory to have, or not, an arranged marriage is a choice but the family pressure not to marry is immense.
Purely my interpretation but it seems in India marriage is all about security.
Not security for the people getting married but security for the rest of the family.
Based on a principle or belief that people can not grow or thrive or even survive unless they are married.  And once married the control in what people do heightens further.

Of course family trying to control people happens all over the world but the intensity of this and the battle between new and old cultures and traditions is far more visible in India than it is in the west.  I’ve never more firmly believed in creating the opportunity for people to find their voice.
It is a combination of this and finding my voice that has led me to set up Empower.

The last 3 years have been full on but I have not regretted doing any of this for even a second.  It has been a bumpy journey but one that has ultimately led me to make choices that are right for me.
Has it impacted negatively on my relationships with friends and family?  In short no.
Yes they see me less and they definitely find it a little difficult to understand at times but giving me the freedom to do this has ultimately me brought me closer to them in every other sense.  Empower is all about enabling many more people to do the same.
Empower is not seeking to change the world but empower people to change the world in a way that is right for them and their communities.

A huge huge thank you to everyone who has followed, read and commented on this blog over the last 2 years.  I hope you’ve enjoyed reading my posts as much as I’ve enjoyed writing, ranting and sharing my experiences.

To keep up to date with Empower – Be The Change follow our company blog here:
Empower-BeTheChange

In November 2015 I took the decision to take a step away from Vi-Ability to set up a new social enterprise.
You can read the press release here

So apparently this officially makes me a social entrepreneur?

By definition this is:

“Social entrepreneurs are individuals with innovative solutions to society’s most pressing social problems. They are ambitious and persistent, tackling major social issues and offering new ideas for wide-scale change.” Ashoka

“Today’s disruptors and tomorrow’s brightest stars.” Forbes

“A social entrepreneur is a leader or pragmatic visionary who: Achieves large scale, systemic and sustainable social change through a new invention, a different approach, a more rigorous application of known technologies or strategies, or a combination of these.” Schwab Foundation

It is with bemusement that I read these definitions and think that this maybe used to describe me.

I believe passionately about people being afforded opportunities and choices to follow their dreams. Believe there is an opportunity to build a business model around this and create lasting social change but, I don’t believe this makes me any better, different or special.  

After all, isn’t anyone who is truly passionate and committed to their job, the volunteer work they do, a social change maker?

Many people have said “how brave” it is, “how bold” it is, how they “couldn’t do what I was doing”.

Everyone who has said this has received the same reaction from me.  “Oh….., thanks” and a look of bemusement because to me its none of these things.

Whilst no stranger to being “different”, to me I am simply following my dreams and doing what is right for me.
I guess this is the very definition of empowerment.

Two and half years into this journey and only 3 months into setting up Empower – Be The Change I have to admit that the realities of following your dreams is, at times, a double edged sword.

Freedom

When I left the UK in August 2013 I know I was after one thing.  Complete freedom. 

By my own admissions I spent the first 2 years of my time in India striving for complete independence.
Striving to prove to myself and others that I can do what I want and do this independently.  Whether I went about this in the right way is very much up for debate.  Thankfully the people closest to me supported me to do this, whilst at the same time a little worried and bemused.

It’s been a very steep learning curve and not least of all doing this in, what can only be described as one of the most chaotic, culturally different and demanding countries in the world.
Simply, there is no where like India.
But I know now I can travel anywhere, navigate my way around, find things to do and look after myself.

The learning curve gets ever steeper

For me the journey of social entrepreneurship, freedom, choice and empowerment started in August 2013 and I realise now how much of me I have put into this.
Physically, mentally and emotionally with little reprieve or escape back to some kind of normality.

Over 2 years I’ve invested heavily in people, organisations and projects. Seeking opportunities, driving things forward, investing huge amounts of energy, constantly believing that it will result in some better outcome and change.

There is no denying that a lot has been achieved in this time but going about this in a completely independent way has limited longevity.

Constantly putting in and getting smaller returns from people, projects and organisations in terms of energy, commitment and most of all support soon takes its toll.

Since November, starting a new social enterprise, the learning curve has got ever steeper.

There are some, blogs, books and articles about setting up a social enterprise but few talk about the personal journey and the demands it places on individuals. An area I think needs much greater focus and discussion.

Setting up

So day one and where do you start and what do you do?

For me, this was and continues to be the easy part.  

Long term planning, logical processes and having the discipline to manage this effectively is something I have extensive experience of.

Week by week and even day by day I know exactly what I need to work on and its purpose in the bigger picture. The discipline and focus to get things done has been easy.

It is not the challenge in managing this complete freedom and autonomy to follow your dreams.

It is not a feeling of not knowing where to start, what to do and where to focus.  

It is not about not knowing what the business model will be, the sources of income and building partnerships.  
I find myself in the fortunate position that I have a lot of skills and experiences to draw and use.

Setting up in India has not been without its challenges but it is not the technological or limited infrastructure of being in a developing country that is the the challenge.

It is the continued journey of self-discovery that gets steeper and more complex.  

Being a social entrepreneur

Social entrepreneurs are different.
They go places other people wouldn’t.
They find opportunities in the most peculiar places and they refuse to see conventional boundaries.
I don’t think it is arrogant or misplaced to say that this is exactly what I have done.

I’ve definitely created my own opportunities.  Refused to bow to convention or what is expected and created my own path but it has always been on other peoples terms (no matter how loosely this has been).  

To set up a social enterprise with ultimate freedom was therefore the most natural next step but as I am realising quickly, to do this independently is both foolish and arrogant.

Few jobs offer the opportunity to use and develop such a range of skills and is without doubt the most rewarding and satisfying thing about this.

Its definitely brought out my true geeky side but also creative.

Immersing myself for hours into working out and calculating the business model has been complex, brain heavy but rewarding.

Developing a website from scratch, writing the content, creating the layout, deciding on fonts, colours, pictures and other media has been fantastic.

Building links and partnerships, perhaps the bit I have always enjoyed the most, is providing significant developments in the growth of the business.

With work I am by own admissions a complete geek when it comes to planning, time management and motivation.  I am not tied to a rigid structure at all but knowing what to do when, how and why has never been an issue.

Outside of work I’ve learned to adapt and find ways to enjoy some of the things I would in the UK in India. Doing exercise, watching tv, keeping up with people and I’ve done this pretty well.

Rarely if ever have I felt bored, lonely or isolated.
I’ve become pretty good at looking after myself, recognising the signs when I need a break, a change of scene, to contact people at home or to take some time for myself.

Inter-dependence 

But having spent 2 years exhausting my independence I am the first to admit that what I crave is a true state of inter-dependence.

The biggest challenge is a constant feeling of isolation.

I wouldn’t say lonely as I’ve become extremely resilient to time alone and keeping myself busy.  

But constantly doing things alone leaves me feeling very isolated.

It is a common feeling amongst start-up business people.  

Once you step out of the conventional rat race no matter how unconventional it might be you are in a situation where suddenly everything is your responsibility, making and doing.

Don’t get me wrong this isn’t about being scared of hard work or having the belief to do this.  
It isn’t about the motivation to work or even the knowledge and skills to know what to work on, setting my own deadlines and managing my own work.  
It’s the lack of external input day in day out.

Yes I have family, friends and mentors that I call on regularly but with a 5.5 hour time different between most of these people it is often mid afternoon before I can seek any input into my day.

This isn’t a criticism but I have learnt early on the importance for any entrepreneur or person doing this how important a wide and varied network of support is.

There have been many articles in the Guardian Women in leadership weekly newsletter that have resonated with me lately but not least of all this one

Simply, ambition is good but a balance in our lives is equally if not more important.

Re-instating some normality

Since November I’ve realised the value of having that immediate support network around you and when its suddenly gone (albeit from personal choice) it takes a lot to readapt.  

Under normal circumstances, normal being based in the UK having stepped out of a job to start a company, would still be daunting but I perhaps a lot more manageable.

Starting this after 2 years of injecting all of me into adapting to another country and trying to work out what to do has been a different ball game.

Empower is about supporting people, communities and organisations to realise their ambitions and goals.  

This is the primary drive and focus of the company but to do this effectively I need to make sure I’m am also getting the right support, challenge and input.

This is challenging in India and at a time when I feel exhausted from the input I have already given I have to accept that right now I need to be a bit selfish and take some time out for myself.

Yes being based in southern India I have opportunities to travel but having spent 2 years on an independence crusade I am totally over solo travel.
I know I can travel anywhere in India and be ok doing it.  
I know how the buses and trains work.  
I can get myself around the country with relative ease.  
I know places to visit, places to stay, restaurants and bars.  
But I want to share this with other people now.

This isn’t a moan at all.

99% of the time I feel like the luckiest person in the world.

I don’t have to rely financially on anyone else to do what I am doing, a position afforded because of what my previous UK job allowed me to do.

I am surrounded by an extremely supportive family who yes have questioned what I am doing but have never sought to stop me and have helped in anyway they can.  
Same goes for my friends.  Long distance relationships of any sort are hard but I’m fortunate that I have good loyal friends who invest the same level of time and energy into a friendship that I do.

But right now, I recognise the importance for me to reinstate some normality back into my life.

On 14th March I head back to the UK and for the first time in 2.5 years I am counting down the days.  I haven’t fallen out of love with India at all and I know as soon as I land in the UK I will miss it.  
But there is an increasing sense of frustration about not being able to do the things I need to do for the company and having ready access to the input that I think is critical right now. 

Every entrepreneur is different and every one will have their own battles and challenges, but for me, from my personal experience I can not underestimate the importance of:
1.  Looking after yourself, recognising the signs of potential burnout and accepting its ok to take some time out.
2.  Building a solid support network around you with as much input as you can get.

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Our latest news: Tumblr-Jan2016

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 1,100 times in 2015. If it were a cable car, it would take about 18 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

Vi-Ability is proud to announce its first micro-investment to support a female entrepreneur set up her own social enterprise.

On Women’s Entrepreneurship day Vi-Ability visibly demonstrated its on-going commitment to support individuals achieve their goals through an agreement, which will see Vi-Ability commit a micro-investment for Jo Clay to kick-start a social enterprise.

Over the last 18 months Jo has worked for Vi-Ability as the operations manager, in Tamil Nadu, South India and has successfully built a strong presence for Vi-Ability in working in partnership with Indian based social enterprise Silo India.

Through her role Jo was able to successfully support Silo India to not only establish themselves as a thriving and stable social enterprise, but to set up a high quality international volunteer program of which 16 of our young people directly benefitted.

From funding received through ‘Gwirvol’, Vi-Ability successfully placed 16 young people from Wales, many of whom were unemployed, to complete month long volunteer placement in India.  Through this placement all 16 individuals developed their skills, confidence and knowledge and have all successfully secured and sustained employment on their return to the UK.  Equally these young people have had a profound and lasting impact on the local communities in which Silo India operate.

To build on this strong foundation Vi-Ability will now work in partnership with Jo to support her to set up her own enterprise.

The ethos and social objective of the company will be to empower individuals to achieve their personal goals and ambitions.  By doing so creating a society where people are more willing to support each other and the communities in which they live and work.  Firmly based on the principles of freedom, opportunity and choice.

Initially the company will focus on three distinct aspects, life coaching, international work-based opportunities and empowerment projects in the rural communities of India.

The company will be registered in Wales and will have a strong presence in both the UK and India. The company will commence trading in early 2016.

Vi-Ability will retain and grow its presence in India through commissioning this new enterprise to deliver products and services.

Founder & CEO Kelly Davies said: “This is an exciting time for both companies, and we wish Jo every success in this forthcoming venture. We also hope this will be the first of many investments Vi-Ability makes in budding entrepreneurs and the future change makers of the world”

See more of the work Vi-Ability and Jo has been doing in india here!